Diamondbacks 3, Dodgers 9: Everything is awesome

Sixteen defeats in a row. Oh, and we’ve lost Carson Kelly.

Record: 20:52. Pace: 45-117. Change on 2004: -7.

Well, here we go. I get the dubious honor of doing a recap, though I guess at this point every writer for this blog is in that boat. So here we go, going in to another game and set to keep adding to that historical loss record. Nice.

At least there is beer.

Beer 1: Queen of Fruits Sour Beer by Great Notion Brewing Co

I’ll be upfront with you all: I’m mailing this in.

No, I’m not writing without watching or listening to this game, but I sure as shit am not too invested in it.

So here we go, channeling the minimum effort.

Peacock quickly makes this game unattainable after giving up 2 runs in the 1st. Oh Joy: 2-0 Dogders.

No dice from the Dbacks in the 1st, which should surprise absolutely no one.

Doyers rack up another here in the 2nd, and seems seem quite far away.

Peacock just keeps failing at life here in the 3rd as he walks Chris Taylor. Luckily our defense ensures up and we go in to the 9th with.

Beer 2: Double Berry Shake Fun by Great Notion

Ok, kinda blacked out there, but that’s the price you play for glory.

No dice in in the 3rd or 4th, thus we’re back to the same old game here in the 5th,

It’s hard to believe with just how bad we are, but we last won a month ago here. Wow.

I must have blacked out again, for we’re now down 0-3 here in the 6th. Fun time.

I’m over this. Bye.

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“Got in big Fitch. Can’t najd work out.” This was the text message received from Turambar tonight, timestamped at 8:35 pm. It makes considerably more sense now, in the light of the above. And I can hardly blame the man. In a season of dire performances, in some ways this was just another one, a buzzing sound in the interminable cacophony of this endless season. But every loss has something special, a unique snowflake in this winter of our discontent.

I tuned in, just in time for the sixth inning. Matt Peacock had left the game, after a credible enough outing, considering how badly it had started. He went five innings, allowing three runs on seven hits and two walks with three strikeouts. Under normal circumstances, that might have been enough to keep the D-backs in the game. But never mind a run, the Diamondbacks were incapable of getting a hit off Walker Buehler. There were hardly even any hard-hit outs to give reason for hope. Then the sixth inning happened and any hopes of this ending the losing streak got well and truly Ginkel’d. Sorry, April.

By the time we reached the middle of the sixth, reliever Kevin Ginkel had thrown 36 pitches, walked four batters, and allowed a bases-clearing double to Justin Turner. It was only the eight time a Diamondbacks pitcher had given up four walks in an outing of one inning or less. The last was Greg Holland, in July 2019. After another three Diamondbacks had made outs – admittedly, Josh Rojas got hosed by a terrible strike three call – new Diamondback Jake Faria made his debut. He allowed an unearned run (due to a Christian Walker error) on a hit and a walk.

But that half-inning was notable for a terrible bit of news. Walker had hit Carson Kelly on the wrist with a pitch in the second. The D-backs’ catcher had stayed in the game initially, before being replaced by Stephen Vogt for the fourth. However, it turned out that Kelly had a fractured wrist, to go alongside the broken toe through which he was already playing. Two bones down, 204 to go… He’s going to miss a considerable amount of time, and that ends his shot at being the team’s All-Star representative this year. I dunno who it’ll be now. Maybe we should just donate the slot to a more deserving team.

Three more Diamondbacks up; three more Diamondbacks retired, as Buehler completed seven no-hit innings. Feria then gave up a two-run homer in the top of the eighth, making it 9-0. [The “Let’s go, Dodgers” chants rang around Chase Field. Which makes sense. I mean, who actually wants to live in Los Angeles?] David Peralta saved the home team from complete embarrassment, leading off the eighth with a clean single to left-center. It was only the second ball hit out the infield to that point by Arizona. It probably says something that a lousy single was anointed the Chas Roberts Cool Play of the Game. Not exactly fierce competition tonight.

One out later, Nick Ahmed also singled, and that was it for Buehler. Tim Locastro then pinch-hit for Faria, and ended the shutout with an RBI single to right. Josh Rojas struck out, but Ketel Marte – who, on consideration, is most likely to be our All-Star – provided some respectability to the score with a two-run double. From a no-hitter to three runs for the inning, in the space of eighteen pitches. But it was really just adding a thin veneer of dollar-store paint over the rust bucket lemon which was tonight.

Ryan Buchter worked a 1-2-3 ninth, and the Diamondbacks failed to add to their tally in the the bottom half. That’s now a startling sixteen losses in a row, and it feels like they may never win again. Our 3-4-5 hitters combined to go 0-for-10 with six strikeouts. That includes Walker’s 0-for-3 with three K’s, as well as that error. He’s now hitting just .194 for the year. Pavin Smith was 0-for-4 with three strikeouts, and didn’t look good either. Whatever is affecting the team, appears to be a roster-wide malaise.

After the game, Carson Kelly spoke to the media, and was clearly very dejected. It’s not clear who’ll be called up to replace him. The obvious candidate is Daulton Varsho, but as Jack pointed out, they may not want two left-handed catchers. Here’s what Kelly and Torey Lovullo had to say after the game [or link].

Thanks to those who appeared in the Gameday Thread. It’s hard to believe anyone actually wants to watch the team at this point, but I guess misery loves company! Present were: AzDbackfanInDc, Bookie Killer, DeadManG, Diamondhacks, EdTheRed99, GuruB, Jack Sommers, James Attwood, Jim McLennan, Keegan Thompson, NikT77, Oldenschoole, Rockkstarr12, Snacks&Dbacks, Snake_Bitten, Tom Babbage, Umbrella24, Xerostomia and kilnborn. Jack deservedly wins Comment of the Night.

At this point, I think I’d probably rather watch the Aces, Renoball and all. Tomorrow, the team will try to avoid losing seventeen in a row. I will likely try to avoid watching them.